used to looove wearing these n-gowns when i was a little girl. just found out they come in adult sizes too, which depresses me. should be getting mine in a couple days!

self-portraits

picture booth + molly =each and every tuesday night from 8pm-12am.
is that vain?

a tale of two cities, with the same high profile name

after yahoo'ing (i yahoo when i want to be retro-search-engine-ing) the weather in chicago, yahoo asked me if i meant chicago, illinois or chicago, wisconsin. and i was all "yahoo! of course, illinois." which then spurred a yahoo weather search of all major u.s. cities - how many new yorks are there? well, one if you ask me. TEN if you ask yahoo. does anyone really want to know the temperature in new york, georgia? i guess the people who live there do. i'd like to rename all the los angeles, texases and cleveland, tennessee's out there. i'm embarassed for these towns. they must feel so overshadowed.

this was a weird topic, but thanks for sticking through readership!

(the real )windy city bound,
molly

4 de julio

this is what automatically happens when you put Britney's "Hit Me Baby" on the ipod.

indoor fireworks

Hope everyone had a BLAST on July 4th!!! The above picture was taken last night from inside my living room. I bought some f-works from 'South of the Border' during my Teen Tour back in '87, and decided to finally test them out in my apartment. Pretty beautiful, right? I'm a little 3rd degree burned but totally worth it.

love,
molly

uh oh guys, it's...

INSTIGATING AWKWARD MOMENTS NIGHT!!

Tonight I plan to make one or more people slightly uncomfortable with a delicate combination of invasive questioning and aggressive humor. I can't wait!

my new pick-up line!

"Do you want to head back to my place and fill out my dress with a baby?"

This only works if your'e wearing one of those maternity-lite dresses that make you wonder if she is or isn't "you know what".

potpourri sentence of the day

My roomate Jenn said the best sentence of the day:

"The old chinese man seemed very concerned that I didn't have a napkin"

it was a real "you had to be there moment".

'night,
molly

mtv spot y'all

Watch the re-cut version of Vagina Etiquette on MTV's Short Cirtcuitz show Thursday, June 21 @ 10:30pm on your TV! It's also here.

love,
molly "keepin' it proper" reisner

please don't wear message shirts that make me sad for you

i saw a girl on the train today wearing a shirt that said "overexposed" and i was like "are you? because i've never seen your face before."

other message t-shirts that are depressing:

- i survived the holocaust!
- homeless people do it better.
- ithaca is gorges.

happy thursday fanbase! and a special shout-out to my manbase (my male fans i can only assume i have. hi dad!)

british lurrrrve,
molly

a complete lie or failure to achieve goal OR a pretty funny joke if intended as such - click on me

your lucky june 13th awaits you in the below triple post!

so guys - this is my 3rd post today. I'VE NEVER POSTED THIS MUCH IN MY LIFE! if you're an avid mollyreisner.blogspot reader such as myself, then you understand that blogging happens so preciously little. i've decided to give my readers a gift today...enjoy .

all my love (though i don't have that much to give),
molly

it's time for real time thoughts! that just happened! like, now!!

guys,

i just took a big whiff of my hair and stated to my living room "I'm glad I'm clean!"

is that weird?

be honest...i can take it. in small amounts.

love n' stuff,
molly

TATER POTS!

tater pots!
tater pots!
perfect for growing your favorite herb.
tater pots!
tater pots!

the tater pot with that "you know what I'M growing" wink is my favorite. Yeah, i KNOW what you're growin' tater! it looks like basil or maybe mint.

the tater pot with the open smile just diarreahed and feels incredible relief!

and the tater pot with the yellow legs is depressed but trying to be brave.

tater pots!
tater pots!
let's be friends.

love,
molly

reluctant gum-giving: a photo series

these are all the various stages of reluctance i go through when i give away my last piece of gum. i try to keep it to myself.

new website!!

if you're like me, A BLUE SKY THINKER, you probably have a running list of amazing ideas such as figuring out a way to make your favorite foods float around you at all times.

if you're like me, SOMEONE WITH MEDIOCRE TO POOR FOLLOW-THROUGH, then you probably don't do much to make those ideas a reality.

So check out my new website: www.someoneelsedothis.com where I will post my ideas for a productive person to seize upon! Problem is I need someone else to create this website for me.

an open letter to honeybees (everywhere)

dear honeybees,

where ya at? i read on the cnn.com that you guys are playing a global game of "we're disappearing at an alarmingly rapid rate with no explanation why."

come back! we need you. and not just for the selfish reasons of wanting you to pollinate flowers and plants so we can continue eating:

HONEY



FRUIT IN GENERAL



ALL KINDS O' NUTS


we miss your "can-do" personality that subsequently allows us to eat apples, nuts, avocados, soybeans, asparagus, broccoli, celery, squash, cucumbers, citrus fruit, peaches, kiwi, cherries, blueberries, cranberries, strawberries, cantaloupe and other melons.

we love you honeybees! you're a true talent, especially at the "providing food for humans" thang! we will never take you for granted again (until we find a way to create these foods without your help.)

we've organized a welcome back pollinating party for when you return! free honeybee-sized ipods for you too! music really helps the honeybee work-a-day go much faster.

also, no need to be embarrassed about your sudden disappearance. if it was a heroine bender or whatever, we are here for YOU!

much love and need,

molly

april 17 - the highs and the lows

i'm not even gonna introduce it. oh no! i think i just did.

oh heckles be jeckles! let me get a little more formal then ...

(violently clears throat)

ladies and gentlegayfolk,

here below it is my pleasure to share with you the below record-breaking all-time best and worst moments of my day.

BEST: having a liberating "i can change my life if i want to!" kind of feeling for a couple hours in a row

WORST: being paralyzed by a "I can change my life if i want to." kind of feeling for a couple hours in a row

sweet dreams readership!

molly

guess who's blowing into town?

my old buddy- THE NOR'EASTER!!!!

is anyone scared?

don't be. Nor'Easter might lift up your body and slam it into a tree, but she doesn't mean it.

Nooooooooooooooooor'Easter!

No-no-don't-blow-me-into-a-treeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!

if you are frightened by Nor'Easter I've set up a shelter at my home. Provisions include:

Guitar Hero (2 player)
Homeade popcorn
A viewing of Britney Spears' debut film, Crossroads
Minute by minute updates of Noreastie
Spotty internet access
A viewing of Britney Spears last HBO special
Pure fear
Dancing


Come!

love,
molly

Breaking News...guess who won Guitar Hero II on MEDIUM!?!?!?!?!

Thanks.

It was a harrowing, passionate rendition of Free Bird that launched me into Guitar Hero status. Now I can legitimately offer guitar (hero) lessons if I'm ever down n' out!